Tuesday, April 10, 2012

In the "Beginning".

If it’s possible to see the day this blog was created,
you’ll see I created it a while ago and just haven’t written…
When I first came to this empty white space I thought “How
will I find the words of wisdom and courage that are needed to make the impact
I hope to achieve?”

And the answer? I closed my laptop with the page still

So here’s the truth. I still have no clue what I’m
doing. If my words portray wisdom and
courage, then it is fate. Those are the only words intended to flow freely at
that moment. Today I still don’t have expectations for this blog.
I can’t guarantee you that you’ll love it, or that you’ll even so much as like it. I
can only hope that maybe you can relate. If I’m lucky, you might even take
something away from it.
Most people start at the beginning. I personally think that
is ridiculous. There’s no way I could tell you everything you would need to
know about me from the beginning. There’s way too much to cover. I can tell you that
I was born in Mississippi. My family life was far from perfect. My parents divorced somewhere around the time I was born. (What a treat right?) Welcome to the world baby girl, and you
sir? Sign on the dotted line. I can tell you about growing up an only child
with a single parent until my mother remarried when I was 5. We moved to
Tennessee, and unfortunately that’s where I spent most of my life, as one of 10
kids. I can tell you about coming out in the south when I was 14, and literally
being paddled (Yes I do mean “Whipped” with a wooden board) for being gay… but
none of these things will bring you any closer to knowing me.. I would miss all
of the stories that actually made me who I am. Like the time I fell off my
bicycle and broke a beer bottle with my wrists. I have matching scars on each,
that sometimes people still gawk at assuming I must have been suicidal. They
have no real understanding about how much I cherish life. Or how instead of
sleeping with dolls and teddy bears, this 7 year old cuddled with 3 full sized
basketballs at night.
So, I’ll do it this way instead. If you’re reading this then
you’re starting this journey with me. Right here from the beginning. This
beginning. Our beginning. That means that you will get to know me day by day
through my words. You won’t be affected by my past unless I gradually reveal
it. Consider me someone you ran into in a coffee shop or book store. Someone
that you may or may not continue getting to know. Consider this a new
And as new friends we might as well start with today. Today
I am packing my things, signing my final documents and sending out my last few
emails before I sleep the night away preparing for my 6 day journey. I am going
on a business trip to Columbus Ohio. I’ll be going to the Equine Affaire there.
I’m sure you’re wondering “What kind of job sends you to an Equine Affaire in
Ohio?” Mine does. I’m an Admissions Counselor for the best College in the
world. Stephens College (I graduated from there as well.) It’s an All Women’s
College located in “Collegetown USA”, Columbia MO. I’m sure a lot of you are
thinking “Of course the lesbian went to a women’s college.” And you’re
absolutely right. I did. Not even because it was all women. (Most of our girls
are straight!) I went because they gave me scholarships to play Basketball and
Softball, and because from the moment I stepped foot onto campus, I knew I was
home. And that’s exactly what it has become.
My mind is wandering. The point I was getting to is I’m now
the Admissions Ambassador for our Equestrian Program (As well as a few others
I’m sure you’ll be hearing about), and because of that I’ll be in Ohio for 6
days. Lucky me? I hope so. I’ll be gradually blogging for however long I feel
is necessary to get my thoughts out so feel free to follow along on this
journey with me. In other words?
“ It’s nice to meet you. My name is Tennessee.”

Until next time…
“One day we wake up and realize that it was all true. We
really do have the option to be anything we want, we just have to travel down
the winding roads that lead us there. Whether you want to be in a circus (I
suggest befriending a clown), an Astronaut (Get over that fear of heights AND
wise advice from a good friend : Don’t smoke Menthol cigarettes) or maybe you
really just want to be a Librarian (petition for the preservation of in-print
literature) you can do it. Believe in yourself and stop at nothing to achieve
your goal. No one is going to hand you the opportunity and trust that you’ll
achieve what you say you will. They want to see results before they take a
chance. So actively pursue your dreams. If you don’t believe in yourself… who

Remember me. 

I’m Tennessee.


  1. Nice words. Well said. I always like reading your tweets because you seem To have a very positive outlook. Thanks for sharing.

  2. Thank you. I always hope thats how i'll be perceived. :)